Hick's Concert Reviews!

Howdy, y'all! Since don't none of the media give any reviews of my performances (don't know why, Hell, they review everybody else's! Maybe they just can't find the words to describe the King of Music!), I'm a jest gonna have'ta tell y'all that didn't see me about 'em myself!

Well, SOME of the media give us reviews. Here's one from a paper in Long Island, NY.

The Music Paper (on Long Island)

HICK'RY HAWKINS & SIDEMEAT, "ANARKY, TENNESSEE!"(cd7)

These here fellas are some of the best country hillbilly punks, uh, punkabillys, to come along in a while. With great song structure to harness some wonderfully humorous lyrics, ANARKY, TENNESSEE is everything you've ever thought was dumb and cliched about hillbilly music except it's incredibly hip when spewed from the mouth of Hawkins. If this record came out before Hootie's, the world would think about Columbia, South Carolina, in a whole different way.

Well it was a rainin cats and dawgs on Valentine's Day! I spent the whole day a walkin around the Carolina Coliseum a puttin up flyers in hopes that I'd get some Circus folks ta come ta the show. I wanted Airiana the Human Arrow ta be my Valentine but could'nt find her.

Miss Katherine Caine performed with us again and this time as a special treat she was joined by Sidemeat! It was a beautiful performance very fittin fer Valentine's Day!

Were'nt a whole lot a folks out that night, I think maybe the rain kept'em away, but we gave the folks who did come their money's worth one more time. At times the audience seemed like they wanted ta go ta sleep so I took off most a my clothes and then folks really went ta sleep! I think we played about 20 songs which is about the shortest set we ever played cos they have ta close early at TRUSTUS!

I did'nt even break a geetar string this time but I did break three picks! We had some folks drive all the way down from Boone, NC just ta see us and that was real nice. Sometimes ya can't get people from Columbia ta drive ten minutes ta see us. But everbody had a good time and the folks at TRUSTUS were very nice ta us, which is more than I can say fer some venues! I just wish Airiana had been there!

Y'know this here has been one of my very, very favorite places to play. Even though it has nuthin to do with the management which is a shame and even though it's hard to get a good sound in that room, it's still a special place.

Any how after much confusion about when the openin band was gonna get there (they finally showed at 11:30) we kept havin to apologize all night cos folks were leavin cos it was gettin late. About the openin band I won't say anything if'n I can't say nuthin nice.

Anydamnway we got on round 12:30. We was all mad and tired, but soon as we started we forgot about all that and we played for damn near 3 hours, the place was full, there was even some ol' friends of mine from Norfolk, VA who jest moved down here! Miss LadyBird sang with us again and it was beautiful as always! The audience was wonderful. All ya folks that came out there that night, y'all are beautiful! That's why we've enjoyed playin the Hunter Gatherer, even though they made us pay for our whiskey! You, the audience, always make it special there. Thanks fer listnin to us and a comin to our shows, we hope ya keep on a comin to see us. thanks again!

Y'all what missed this one oughtta damn well be ashamed of yerselves! Miss Kathryn Kane opened for us, her first performance here in Hootieville. Lemme tell ya folks if ya think I'm kuntry Miss Kathryn makes me look and sound like a New York City Slicker!

She sings like an Angel and looks like one too! The only problem was she didn't sing long enough! Me and all the rest of the folks kept a hollerin fer more! There's one more Hillbilly singer in town now so ya better watch out fer her and listen!

Now by the time yers truly got on to the stage he was quite "loose". I had me a brand new leopard skin coat on (don't worry, imitation) that was quite stylish if I must say so myself. We started off with "Rave On" like usual, that always gets y'all goin.

I don't remember quite what I said to the audience that night but nobody throwed no beer bottles at me. I was even able to stand up during most of the show. My main man and bass player Ugly Chick was right on as usual, even though he didn't have the stand up bass, he was still purdy damn scary. My drummer Cracker Ray was the sober one this time. I think he lost his Elvis glasses! If'n any y'all know where they are, please let one of us know. The boy just ain't right since they been gone.

Anydamnway, later in the show my good friend Miss LadyBird Hawkins got up with us and sang "Don't Come Home a Drinkin", "You Belong to Me", what was both beautiful! Then we sang "Fairytale of New York" together. I think I saw a lot of folks get teary eyed!

Well, after that we tore it up some more playin all yer fave Hick music and a watchin people holler and ladies a tryin to tear my clothes. Miss Fontaine came up and did "I'm So Lonesome" and "Don't Ever Leave Me Again" and folks jest a started cryin again and a drankin like goin outta style. At the end of the night after folks quit cryin cos there weren't no more beautiful songs a bein played, Mr. Darius "i know ya can't believe cos i couldn't believe it either" Rucker came up and joined us for "Waitin on a Friend" and a kick ass version of "Honky Tonk Women". I gave him a hug and people started cryin again! Later, we all got even drunker and sang Irish folk tunes round the bar! T'was a grand ol' time! Y'all that was there, thank ya very much, we luv ya! Y'all what weren't better get ya asses to the next one!